Social Media Hiatus: What I learned

It is so nice to be back to blogging. I have to be honest, I have had writer’s block, I’ve been stressed, and this year I started off with a good cry. 2017 was a humbling experience, for in those moments I concluded being comfortable is not the way to live life. Living comfortably makes me live a repetitious life. That is, going through the same problems, experiencing the same things in life, and just being in the same spot. It is still. It is boring. It is not where I want to be. I guess you can call this a little fast.

In the beginning of the month I came across a video on youtube on how social media contributes to depression. Long story short, whenever we log in to social media and see that we have notifications waiting for us, it is a shot of endorphin (that happy hormone that we can attain through a good steady run). As humans we need to stay active, but we also need human contact as well. Now because we are in the age of technology, both of those needs have been stunted. While the benefit of convenience comes from social media (not having to get up and travel to see anyone), we lack in several other areas of our life which is now taking a toll on our overall health. Instead of physical and mental benefits of attaining a runner’s high from a nice jog with a friend (social benefits), we rely on a notification or like from people we have not seen in months or even years to reaffirm that we are indeed being thought of. And when we don’t receive a certain amount of likes or a response in an efficient amount of time, we question our self-worth.

For those reasons, and allocating my time in a more productive way, is what led me to leave social media for the month of January. January being the beginning of not only a new month but a new year, I noticed I start my new years off disappointed. I spend the last week and a half of December planning my year and setting my goals and when the new year comes, while starting can be hard, the hardest part is being consistent. A lot of the reason is because I find myself comparing where others are in their journey to where I am. While this can be motivating, it is mostly depressing for  me personally. Social media accidentally puts me in this position a lot of times. There were a couple of things I was able to do in this month:

  1. Reclaiming My Time: not only do I have a daughter to care for, but I am a student and also pursuing an acting career. I also have financial, mental, and physical goals I wish to achieve. And while I have social goals, social media is not the only place I can enjoy a conversation. Killing two birds with one stone has always been important to me ever since I learned what it meant. Working smarter, and not harder allows me to complete tasks quicker and allows me more time to relax with my family and pursue my dreams (that’s all I really want to do).
  2. Focusing on my Studies: Without having a planner (I still need to get one, but the one I want is expensive), I have been able to allocate my time efficiently to my classes and complete my assignments early. I have also learned how to further engage with my classmates (who said online classes are boring?).
  3. Networking & discovering new things: I have gotten around to doing things I said I would and with that I have met some new contacts! I met a real-estate agent in the salon through talking about God. I was also finally able to finish reading this book (review coming soon) and by the end of the book, I found more resources for auditions—I’ve been looking for this information for a year.
  4. Learning from my environment: I was able to watch those around me in their phones and see how robotic and uniform we look as a whole. There is something unsettling about that. Not being able to hold a good conversation with those around you because of the lack of knowing how to. I can’t really blame this mostly on social media but social media does not help the situation either. While social media raises our awareness of what is going on in the world, why not have a conscious discussion face-to-face versus in an online forum?

While there were some benefits to not being on social media, there were also some challenges.

  1. I was a little lonely: While I have interactions with my family and coworkers, I still felt disconnected because a lot of people were in their phones. But one of my goals were to be in tuned with myself and to focus more on me.
  2. Missed out on news: I only have internet, so I had to log on for the news (weather mostly) or if I needed to contact someone. I did get side tracked and found myself scrolling, but I immediately realized that I wasn’t missing anything and was able to log off and get back to schedule.
  3. Motivation: I get a lot of my motivation from bloggers and instagramers (fitness and diet). It was hard to find motivation in myself to upkeep my fitness and diet goals, but it is what I needed. Learning to lean on myself, finding my strength in my weaknesses were the goals.

I overall believe this was quite beneficial. I can see myself doing this during the work week with social media during the weekends or nonconsecutive days on social media to remaining consistent with promoting my brand and staying connected, but remembering to look up at the world right in front of me is more beneficial. What are the pros and cons of social media for you? Tell me what you think in the comments. Here’s to reconnecting and catching up,

I’m back!

T.

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Quote of the Week 

I’m gonna add another goal to the second half of this year as I have been lying to myself and trying to fake it until I make it. Learning to love myself for who I am (I have flaws as well as my highlights). We all naturally insinuate our strengths, but sweep our weaknesses under the rug if we can’t address them.
I have big dreams. I maybe leading off as if what I am about to say sounds like it intangible but the reality is this: most don’t make it, though few do. The difference between the some from the few? While both have a come-to-Jesus moment in their journey, was what they did about it in the end. Most allow their circumstances dictate their next move, their reaction, their outcome. Few in that moment, change their way of thinking to mold that circumstance to work for them getting them a step closer to where they want to be.

I feel for that to happen, I have to be completely honest with myself. Which I’ve never been.  So I need to add one more goal to my Mid-Year Goals. I officially claim this Self-Love journey I’ve unknowingly been on. Step one: Recognizing & Accepting the things about myself I can’t change. For the things I can change, plan & execute.

No one can produce great things who is not thoroughly sincere in dealing with himself.

-James Russell Lovell
Until Next Time,

t.

3 Study Tips to ensure a Successful Semester

                images

I went through a lot last week. After almost losing my job and injuring myself (wasn’t doing anything strenuous, just bending down for the wipes to change baby’s diaper), I needed some time to hurt and to process what was going on. Now that has came and gone, and on top of that, being into my first week of classes , I realized I literally have nothing to lose..

This dance, I’ve been doing has got to end.

I have re-enrolled in a class that I have failed last semester from being burnt out and tending to the baby even though I had extra help to tend to my studies— I’m a mom, what can I say?) Looking back on it, the class is actually easy, just a lot of work. But I guess I understand, it’s online. They have to make it challenging some how, right? I enrolled with the same instructor, and noticed that she has put all of the assignments for the semester online, open to submission. 

Tip #1: ASK YOUR INSTRUCTOR FOR ALL OF YOUR ASSIGNMENTS AT THE BEGINNING OF THE SEMESTER! 

Some instructors will have no problem posting the work in advance, some may have their own lives to juggle and just won’t have time. They therefore utilize the followed schedule to post assignments as each week approaches. It doesn’t hurt to ask! The worst they can say is no, but if you’re like me you may want to get some or all of the work completed and just be done with it. You do your best to create a schedule, but lets be real, with a little one crawling around, there is no guarantee, babysitters cancel, there could be a schedule change at work, and the like. Which brings us to 

Tip #2: BUY A PLANNER, PRE-ENTER ALL OF YOUR ASSIGNMENTS FOR THE SEMESTER!

This is a holy grail task for me! I have always been forward-thinking and I’ve always pushed to be ahead of the game. This tactic never fails me. If you really want to beat time, I set my assignments to be due a day or two from the actual due date. That way if I look back and panic (BECAUSE I AM A PROCRASTINATOR), I’ll rush to get it done only to see at the assignment drop off page it wasn’t due for another day or two. That way my work is on time! I love that most of my classes give me the first week to study the syllabi and get acquainted with Bb. I use this time to get a head start on my assignments for the semester.

Tip#3: PRIORITIZE YOUR ASSIGNMENTS

I have found that when I focus my time on the heavily weighted assignments, I find my grade doesn’t suffer too much..

This sounds a little unsure. Let me explain: 

See if you read your syllabus, (flash tip: KNOW YOUR SYLLABI!) the instructor usually itemizes each type of assignment you’ll get in the class and next to it is a weighted percentage of its overall worth. It’ll look like this:

Tests 40%

Quizzes 25%

Chapter Summary 25%

Virtual Field Trips 10%

This is a perfect example of prioritizing your assignments from most to least importance. Moms, we have children, we have jobs, and things happen. Let’s say worst case scenario, we haven’t worked on anything all week. It’s the weekend and we look up and realize we have assignments do!we begin to panic begin to rationalize our assignments.. 

So which one of these assignments am I not doing?

Field trips are only 10% of the over all percentage so if we missed one field trip while focusing all of the remaining time we have on the assignments that will keep our grade afloat (tests are a few times given so let’s say quizzes which are on average with every chapter and summaries which are reoccurring) quizzes and summaries are 50% of our overall grade alone! Focusing on that, next week is a new week, brush it off and keep going.

I’ll leave with this:

Understand as moms, everything is trial and error, sometimes we get discouraged but it’s the superwoman in us that continue to keep on keepin on! I hope these tips helped and if you liked them, let me know! If you think of any other tips that helped you, I can use as much help as the next mommy! 

Have a Productive Semester!

Until Next Time,

T

The Blue Pill or the Red?

I need help and guidance here! I’ve been working for my current job for two months, I love it. 

Here’s an overview:

City job. Rate of pay is 14.01 an hour, but I only get 25 hours a week. It pays the bills, but I’m not able to save money like I need to. As much as they love to promote from within the company, I have to be there for at least 6 months before I can even apply for a better position. This is a permanent position. I don’t get benefits (part-time employee), except for the discounts they give me (free services they offer, discounts off rent, and amusement park tickets). the hours are mid-day, 12:30-5:30 which is okay. They’re saying I may have to come in earlier shifts. Like 5-6am, etc. it’s a lot of information to learn which I don’t mind. They have resources out the butt to guide me. There’s a solution for everything. I am also gaining the office & computer experience I’ve been seeking for a while now. But I have a daughter and I can’t just get by. I’m a single mother and will soon be working on one income. On top of that, because I’m in a different tax bracket, taxes are a killer!
Now this other job, if I am offered, 

Is a 12 month contract and pays 14.44 an hour. It’s working with shipments & customers (something else I’ve been interested in) in another city, and offers a mid-day shift but more hours (35 hours weekly, 1-8p).  Double the paycheck of what I’m getting now. Which I could definitely use. I wouldn’t have to worry about a second job, but I would have to deduct my own taxes. I just finished working a contracted position and I owe, but this job would allow me to pay it off. I believe this job maybe a city job (the business I would contract for). So I could receive some benefits/discounts. But after its up, I would be in search of another job if one is not offered to me. I was out of work for two months after my last contracted job. But I do know what I didn’t know then. And have no reasons not to save. I think I’m going to go for if I am offered, but I hate that I’ve invested do much (well I guess two months is not much and I’m not trying to make a career out of either so..?) I think I have my answer but value a second opinion. 

Help me sort this out guys! I need outside perspective! Let me know your thoughts in the comments. I need to converse (laughs)! 

Until Next Time,

T. 

Selfish Summer 16′ (What Type Am I? Book Review)

This summer is about me.
And when I coin the phrase, selfish summer, I don’t mean everyone else is out of luck on my priority list but I must be on the top…

You see I’ve decided instead of taking summer classes (as much as I wanted to) I’d focus my attention on my hobbies and areas of interest. Hell, I deserve to think an academic break. So I’ve decided to tackle a few goals that I’ve had for quite a while.

One of those goals is to read more during my leisure (it’s been a while since I’ve taken time out to do that). I stopped at Barnes and Noble one afternoon after work and came across a great read.

I’m a psych major and found a little peace to find a book that I enjoyed and happened to be in my field of study. Furthermore, I’m all about self improvement and found this to be a great start!

How I grew attached to this book: I am currently finishing up a contracted position that I’ve worked for 5 months. While I’ve enjoyed myself and the people I’ve met along the way, I happened to learn a great deal about myself and specifically my preferences [in the workplace]. Most importantly I’ve discovered that as much as I love customer service, if I can’t help people in the way that I would like to, then I can’t do it. With that being said, I am interested in the intellectual psyche of a persons’ mind. Helping them to understand themselves and what direction they should go after helping them to identify just that. Not listening to their complaining about how their equipment doesn’t work (my current duty as a contractor) and I could go on and on about what if like to do but I’d rather discuss my dislikes (which include, but not limited to):

  1. Up close and personal space invasion
  2. Direct confrontation/discussion unless it is brief
  3. Being interrupted while I am concentrating on a given task
  4. An unstable work environment 
  5. Relying on others to carry out a task i.e. lazy coworkers

Just to name a few.

With that, this read sparked my interest because I have personally struggled in making conscious decisions for myself. I feel that behind that obstacle was because I don’t understand myself: why I do things a certain way and why I have to implement them in that way specifically. Why I address people in a certain manner and act a certain way around others or big crowds. Based off of my biological psyche, what environments I would thrive in the workplace, etc. 

This book goes into understanding yourself and others by the Myer-Briggs personality test (may have taken in high school). So from there I answered some questions about preference and temperament which led me to discover— of confirm— my introverted personality. 

I am an introvert: to sum things up, to be an introvert means to be internally motivated. I prefer not to be around many people and find inspiration in the crevices of my mind.  While I can work with others no problem sometimes it can be a struggle to ask others to do things for me, I would do things myself before bothering someone else with a task (if I am able to). My struggle is using this to my advantage. While being an introvert may seem bad, I don’t feel it is, and the author does encourage you to think that way. While I may come off as quiet I do have great skills: I prefer to write things down and am very particular as I try to be as accurate as possible.

ISFJ: I digress, the image above I took of my personal ID. It is a make up of my preferences and temperament. It stands for Introverting Sensing Feeling Judging. 


I have some work to do this summer!