Where Am I Now
If I could sum up my life as it is right now in one word— Growing Pains (and that’s two words..)
Everything is happening to me at once. I have been put into positions where I am forced to grow, to change my normal way of doing things in order to move forward. I am being forced out of my comfort zone to reach my full potential. I guess I thought I could just go around that and hope people see this amazing person that I know that I am and that is dying to be set free, but I have always stepped on my own shoes. As the days go by, I learn something about myself. I have been so confused about what my problem is exactly and to be honest that is hard to answer. I never knew where to start which was frustrating. I have started off small. Things that I noticed about myself that bothered me I ask myself if they are really that bad. So bad to the point where it was affecting my well being. If yes, than I had to be consciously aware of this and to catch myself and force myself to go into another direction. Okay, maybe not force but slowly make moves to break these habits. For example:
I compare myself to others and entertain their opinions of me.
This is a complicated one for me here. But not really. I am constantly around people. Work, Social Media, Online classes. Constantly working towards the approval of everyone else of my performance. Constantly maintaining a certain standard and putting my best foot forward. Trying to be perfect when in fact, no one is even paying attention to me.
I speak a good game but it’s easier said than done.
I’m gonna add another goal to the second half of this year as I have been lying to myself and trying to fake it until I make it. Learning to love myself for who I am (I have flaws as well as my highlights). We all naturally insinuate our strengths, but sweep our weaknesses under the rug if we can’t address them.
I have big dreams. I maybe leading off as if what I am about to say sounds like it intangible but the reality is this: most don’t make it, though few do. The difference between the some from the few? While both have a come-to-Jesus moment in their journey, was what they did about it in the end. Most allow their circumstances dictate their next move, their reaction, their outcome. Few in that moment, change their way of thinking to mold that circumstance to work for them getting them a step closer to where they want to be.
I feel for that to happen, I have to be completely honest with myself. Which I’ve never been. So I need to add one more goal to my Mid-Year Goals. I officially claim this Self-Love journey I’ve unknowingly been on. Step one: Recognizing & Accepting the things about myself I can’t change. For the things I can change, plan & execute.
No one can produce great things who is not thoroughly sincere in dealing with himself.
-James Russell Lovell
Until Next Time,
For many years the concept of finding yourself versus creating yourself has been a topic of discussion. This concept comes from a famous quote by author George Bernard Shaw “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating you”. Finding Yourself Many times when the topic of finding yourself is usually referenced to a “young […]
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